Houston, We Have a Five-and-Oh
Cleveland State31
Houston17
- Game
- 2025 Week 5
- Date
- 2025-10-11
- Site
- Home
- Result
- Win
- Record
- 5-0
Vikings 31, Houston 17, at home, after the bye. Five and oh, folks. Five! I counted it on my fingers in front of the TV like a kid, and Donna counted with me, because she’s been coming around since Oxford last year.
But you know where I really heard about this game? In Sal’s chair Monday morning.
Sal was in a mood. Not because of Houston. Because of Nolan McCormick, the running back who transferred to us from Ohio this year. “You took our kid, Mick,” Sal said, clippers buzzing near my ear in a way I found threatening. “Athens raised that boy.” I said, “Sal, Cleveland’s raising him now.” He took a little off the top. There’s not much up there, folks. That was a statement.
The point is, this program is a place people want to come now. Transfers from Florida State, from Ohio. Freshmen who start. Fans who count on their fingers with their wives. Five and oh, and a barber with a grudge.
Three pierogi. Sal gets none.
Five and oh. I’m going to need everyone to lower their voices.
A fourteen-point win at home over Houston is solid, efficient and deeply unsettling, because there was nothing in it to complain about. I watched the whole game looking for the crack and couldn’t find one. That’s when you worry most.
My father asked about “the new quarterback, the kid” on Sunday. He remembered him from last week’s call, which he doesn’t always do. He said, “Tell the kid not to get cocky.” I said I’d pass it along. Consider it passed along, Amar’e. That’s from a man who’s been watching Cleveland football since before your parents were born.
Here’s my real worry: Iowa State on the road, then Colorado on the road. The Vikings lost at Colorado last year by three, and I’ve been holding onto that grudge like a warm coat.
The Doom Model, meanwhile, has started saying “eventually” a lot. Eventually is a long word.
Back and forth
Five and oh, Kenny. Five fingers.
Five fingers make a fist. Let’s not punch anything yet.
Sal says we stole his running back.
We did. It was beautiful. Don’t tell Sal I said that.
Five and oh, a barber’s grudge, and one piece of advice for a freshman quarterback from a father in Sarasota.
Split Decision is fiction. Mickey Bridges, Ken Hogmanes and The Lakefront Ledger are invented; the games and scores are not.