Seventy-Six in Provo, and Big Stan Paints The Baraka
Cleveland State76
BYU34
- Game
- 2029 Week 5
- Site
- Away
- Result
- Win
- Record
- 5-0
SEVENTY-SIX POINTS. Vikings 76, BYU 34. In Provo, again, for the second straight year, and this time we scored more. Five and oh!
And Big Stan has painted a new board, friends. The fifth board. The Baraka: kielbasa, fried onions, a pierogi, a second pierogi “because he never stops,” and spicy mustard on a long roll. Named for Baraka Nwangwu, our senior running back, who won the Doak Walker last year and runs like he’s late for something he’s very excited about. Stan unveiled it at lunch Monday and the counter council applauded, and Chester stood up, and Gerald the ham man ordered one and then sat down without being told, which is growth.
I’m told by people who know these things that Baraka is having a special senior year. I believe it. I don’t have the numbers in front of me, and Kenny says we’re not allowed to list them until the end of the season, so I’ll just say this: every time he touches the ball, I stand up. Donna has stopped asking me to sit down. She’s started standing up with me.
Five pierogi. And one Baraka. Two pierogi inside, so that’s technically seven.
Seventy-six points. On the road. The Vikings have scored seventy-one, forty-nine, fifty-six, fifty-five and seventy-six in five games, and the defense is giving up enough to keep it interesting but not enough to matter. That’s the formula: outscore the problem.
Mickey’s right that we don’t list season stats until the end. It’s a rule. It keeps us honest and keeps me from saying things like “Baraka Nwangwu is the best running back I’ve ever covered” in October, which is something I would never say in October.
At trivia, the Lantern Room had a round called “Famous Sandwiches.” My team got none of them right except one: “What sandwich, served in Slavic Village, contains two pierogi ‘because he never stops’?” I wrote “The Baraka.” Nadia read the answer card, looked at me for a long time and said, “How is this a trivia question already?” Big Stan has apparently been submitting questions. He’s infiltrating the bar league.
Five and oh. Miami (OH) in two weeks. The red flag is now blinking.
Back and forth
Seventy-six points, Kenny!
And a sandwich with two pierogi in it. This city has lost all restraint.
Donna stands up with me now.
That’s the most dangerous development of the season. The bleachers can’t take two of you.
Seventy-six points in Provo, a fifth board at Big Stan’s with a double-pierogi sandwich, and a deli owner quietly infiltrating Tuesday trivia.
Split Decision is fiction. Mickey Bridges, Ken Hogmanes and The Lakefront Ledger are invented; the games and scores are not.